- DUMBWAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
- FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when the baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.
- FULL NAME: what you call your child when you’re mad at him.
- GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.
- HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
- INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
- OW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings
- PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
- SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
- STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.
- TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
- TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
*found on the net